Curmudgeon turns housing activist

After realizing that his family’s ancestral home, Fort Ord, had become a toxic waste dump full of old artillery shells, Supreme Curmudgeon Ord cleverly pawned it off at below market rates to various arms of the government. He used the proceeds to develop his wildly-profitable Yellow Fever vaccine, in memory of his formerly-famous Uncle Edward Ord who died of the disease. Now that the site has been cleaned up and is a favorite of hikers, Ord realized he had the perfect way to spoil their fun and get some of those unsightly RVs off the streets of Palo Alto. He became the lead donor on the 22 million dollar project to build a trailer park and Pickleball Stadium on the site.

As part of the agreement, Ord had to agree to pay to remove the 700,000 pounds of his old body parts he had dumped there over the years. In exchange, he got the Parks Department to agree that there would always be a home for Apprentice Curmudgeon Todd’s RV, affectionately nick-named “The Beast.” When asked about this out-of-character display of generosity, SC Ord growled, “Good Riddance. I didn’t like seeing the thing parked around the courts anyway.”